Monday, July 2, 2012

June 2012 Quotes

Alex: I'm pretty sure that's an unwritten 11th commandment.

Leslie: You don't need a husband, you just need a puppy!

Leslie: Is that what boogers are? Recycled thoughts?

Jaron: You could've just sat there quietly, with your thumb in my hand. But no!

Alex: Okay, keep fluttering the eyes. It looks good.

Jasmine: At least his plane didn't crash. Then he wouldn't be texting anyone.

Steve: [to my baby cousin, Josie] You'll make a natural bartender!

Steve: Life's just not complete till you're a felon!

Alex: That's what you get for working it! I'm not sure what you're working, but you're working it.

Jasmine: They should just air condition the whole earth. Then the polar ice caps wouldn't have to melt!

Michael: Have you ever broken a butt before?

Michael: If I was a guy, I wouldn't date me.

Michael: I only sit on guys that I like.

Deb: We talk about crushes, and we talk about crinkles. Let's go one step back and call it a fold.

Tim: I'm a man, I don't use aloe vera.

Tim: I'm not doodling, I'm drawing a vampire face.

Tim: There, now it's righteous doodling!

Catie: You just snotted on my neck!
Dania: But you love me anyway.
Catie: Of course I do! If I didn't like your snot, I would've stopped hanging out with you a long time ago.

Catie: Oh, I was going to tell you about twinkling suits!

Eve: A funeral director. That's like, the opposite of a wedding planner.
Catie: No, I think that would be like a nurse...[pause]...for babies...

Catie: No, I was over on the couch by myself. Where I usually am.

Eve: That's like his Swedish Viking friend that you might meet tomorrow.

Eve: I yell "dude" like a swear word.

Karrah: I think they [men] just decided that it was uncomfortable, so they just made women wear it. "You must bear children and wear heels!"

Karrah: So much cheese, so little mouth.

Student: How comprehensive is the final?
Dr. Platt: Comprehensive.

Jasmine: Don't make us talk about bras again.
Alex: Oh, well I'd stay for that.

Dania: My workout is called standing up.

Jasmine: Alex is so weird, I'm so glad he left.
Alex: I hate that kid.

Jaron: Oh, I was just getting my healthy on.

Jaron: I need my lap buddy. Where's Michael?

Jaron: Why were you nuzzling my neck?
Jasmine: Because I love nuzzles.

Alex: Your hair is so tickley, it drives my face crazy.

Jasmine: He smiles at me like a boy should.

Deb: I'm gonna start going this way, and then down and over. Like a typewriter!

Vanese: I smell like tears!

Deb: [cough] I still have sandpeople in my throat.

Jaron: I'm gonna go eat ice cream and probably massage someone.

Jasmine: I'm waiting for you to get back into your book so I can slurp again.

Jasmine: I'm not trying to be annoying, I'm just trying to drink my ice cube.

Jasmine: Seriously, and you thought I was weird for making out with an ice cube?

Alex: I'd rather find a javelin and throw myself upon it.

Jasmine: You just ned someone to hel you with your backside.

Jasmine: I love some wit in the afternoon.

Tori: I always smell delicious. I also always look beautiful.

Tori: So, apparently he was asking me on a date and I didn't know it...How am I ever going to go on a date if I don't even know they're asking me on one?!

Tori: My thumbs are already losing circulation and will have to be amputated. Then how will I press the space bar?

Mom: And you're not good with adjustments. No offense, but you suck at it.

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